Moving in with your significant other is a huge relationship milestone. Making things “official” is substantial, experiencing your first fight is a big hurdle, sharing “I love yous” is memorable—but moving in together is a game changer. This decision will affect nearly every aspect of your daily life.
Many couples view a permanent sleepover with their favorite person as an exciting, positive situation. This is certainly the case. However, it’s also important to understand that a lot will change about your relationship when you’re living with your significant other. This decision isn’t something to take lightly.
Your significant other might have habits, preferences, and opinions you’re blissfully unaware of. Make sure you’re both on the same page before getting an apartment together by having the following conversations.
What You Should Know Before Getting an Apartment with Your Significant Other
Cover All the Money Questions
If you’re seriously considering moving in with your boyfriend or girlfriend, then you need to have this difficult conversation. It’s crucial that you talk finances with your partner before sharing a home together. Even if you don’t combine bank accounts, you’re still beginning a shared money-management journey.
Start by agreeing on a budget. Everything needs to be discussed — from major items like who’s covering the security deposit, who’s setting up and paying for utilities, how you’re splitting rent, to the more minute details like who’s buying the sofa and who pays for the toiletries. This is important because one of you might prioritize a luxury living experience, whereas the other might care more about pinching pennies to save for a car, vacation, or furniture. You want to have this insight before living with your significant other.
Money is a common source of arguments between couples, so before you make the commitment to live together, be sure you’re both in agreement about who will be covering which parts of your apartment living budget.
Discuss Changes in Relationship Status
Here’s another conversation that might get a little uncomfortable. What happens if things don’t work out? The last thing on your mind before moving in with your boyfriend or girlfriend is a break up. But because you’ll be signing a binding, legal document, you’ll want to make sure you know what the process will be if circumstances change down the road.
Just bring the conversation up so neither person is blindsided down the road. If it makes you more comfortable, consider a short-term lease option and continue to renew it on a 6-month basis.
Cover Chores
Don’t go into a new living situation, even with someone you love and adore, assuming you’ll split chores evenly! Agree on expectations and discuss preferences in the beginning; this will set you up for success down the road. Details like these are exactly what to know before moving in with your boyfriend or girlfriend.
Talk about how often you clean your home now and what your standard of cleanliness is for your new apartment. Cover who’s cooking, who’s washing up after dinner, or if you’ll both fend for yourselves. Do you take the garbage out every night, or only when it’s full? Are you sharing groceries? If so, who shops?
Figure out your own specific preferences, listen to your partners, and come up with a plan to help you both get the most of what you want. If you divide the labor on the ultimate apartment cleaning checklist so you’re feeling the equal burden of responsibilities, you’ll increase the chances of more anniversary celebrations down the road.
Talk About Pet Peeves
When figuring out what to know before moving in with your boyfriend or girlfriend, it’s helpful to be clear about the details you want them to know about you. What gets under your skin and drives you crazy? What makes you angry? How do you respond when you’re annoyed or frustrated? Be honest about habits or actions that don’t jive with you and how you respond to them. There’s no sense in hiding these things. Your significant other is going to find out your personal pet peeves very soon after moving in together — whether you want them to or not!
If having people over late at night bothers you, talk about this before moving in with your boyfriend or girlfriend. If putting clothes in the laundry basket instead of the floor is non-negotiable, explain this to your partner. If you hate dishes being left in the sink, the bed left unmade, a messy bathroom counter, or anything else, bring it up now! Figure out where you are willing to compromise and if you’re actually willing to live with someone else’s quirks and habits.
What’s the Point of Getting an Apartment Together?
This is a discussion many couples neglect. It’s easy to move in together out of convenience or for financial reasons. But are there any other reasons that living with your significant other is on the top of your to-do list?
Make sure you’re both on the same page here. If one of you wants to make this change because they want to take the relationship to the next level, and the other is in it because they’ll save some money, there might be concerns down the road. Again, a potentially difficult conversation, but one that can save time, energy, and heartache in the future.
Ready to Move in Together?
At Southern Management, you’ll see why living with your significant other doesn’t need to be expensive or stressful. We understand that storage space can be just as important as square footage when combining two households into one. For this reason, many of our communities and floor plans incorporate additional space and have on-site storage.
Ready to level-up your relationship status? Contact us online.